We all have 2 rooms in our hearts & minds that we put stuff in. On e is the Gloom Room. This is where we put the bad things people have done to us, the bad things we’ve done, and the bad stuff that just happens. Life happens.
The second room is the Bloom Room This is where we put the good things people have done for us, the good we’ve done and the good stuff that just happens. Again, Life happens!
When we have an event we choose which room to put it in. If the event is important, I suggest we actually imagine actually hanging the event on the wall in whichever room we choose. Most events can go in both rooms – but we usually don’t do that. You can move events from one room to the other over time, and that happens a lot.
Here is the key: It doesn’t really matter which room has more memories in it, it only matters which room you spend your time in.
Time is our most precious commodity so where we spend it has a huge influence on our moods and attitudes. We also assume what we tell ourselves is true – which is not really true – so what we tell ourselves and think about makes a huge difference. You clearly can decide, which room you spend your time in, which room you are thinking about, what events you are reliving!
So I strongly suggest you do the following exercise – download the worksheet or just use paper – keep a binder – in your handwriting.
- Make list of some memories or events in each room.
- Take time, even set alarms if you want, and ask yourself which room you are in. Especially when you are feeling down.
- Write a clear description of both rooms. Do this in your own handwriting and make it vivid. To help you get started, my “room descriptions” are below.
My Gloom Room: It’s a big room, cold, dark. Not a cave, more like a morgue. It’s smells like mold and the only sounds are some bats and the groans of man. The groans come from a cross in the center of the room . The man on the cross is barely alive. He is bloodied & beaten beyond recognition and every time I walk in the room he looks at me and I can’t help but lock eyes with him. I’m holding a whip & a hammer in one hand and my memory in the other. After looking at the man on the cross and what’s in my hands, I just toss my meaningless memory on the pile of junk by the door and walk back out. The guy on the cross grimaces at me.
My Bloom Room: It’s actually a courtyard built around the entrance of a cave. The cave has a stone that once covered the opening but it’s cast aside now. There’s lots of plants and trees etc. I even added a pool a while back. There’s benches, open spaces, and walls covered with memories all over the place. Every time I walk in a football comes flying at me and I have to make a one handed catch while I hold the newest memory in my other hand. I smile at the man who threw the ball and he waves a wounded hand back at me and smiles a huge smile back. I can see the scars on his forehead but the thorns are gone. I holler “I’m gonna drop one of these sometime.” and he reminds me “Memories don’t break.” When I’m in that room I literally play catch or go swimming with my friend Jesus and we talk about anything and everything – even the painful stuff. The room is full of life, and love & who wouldn’t want to go there.