Juggling Life : Knowing Your Limit
We’re going to introduce Trailblazer Tuesday and the Preferred Adventure Center. Now I know that takes some explanation for you guys and everybody out there in the Facebook world.
I’m sure we got millions of people watching us right now. We’re in a basement room at Preferred Insurance Center and if you want to think of it as the bat cave, that would be awesome, right?
But the reason I’m calling it – and I’m going to call the whole office the Preferred Adventure Center. It’s because I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and we do things a lot different. We have a lot more to offer than just insurance. I was thinking, “You know, life is never going to be a walk in the park. So don’t just go on a walk. Go on an adventure.” That’s what we intend to do and we intend to help you do the same thing.
Now what’s an adventure? It doesn’t matter if it’s you as an individual or your family or your business or your farm or whatever. We know where we’re at right now and hopefully, most of us have a dream about where we want to go. The distance between where you are and your dream, that’s your adventure.
Now most insurance agents, all they have to offer is insurance. So they’re going to come along, try to sell you as much insurance as you’re willing to buy, throw in your backpack and carry on that adventure. But that’s not us.
We want to help you buy the least amount of insurance you need to make sure your dreams don’t become a nightmare. Then we’re going to grab our backpack, which is probably going to be pink, fill it with all the stuff we do outside insurance and go on that adventure with you. So that’s why I’m calling it the Preferred Adventure Center.
What’s Trailblazer Tuesday? Well, we need to start getting together and talk about training for things and learn new techniques and stuff like that, which is what we’re going to do today. Then sometimes we’re going to talk about our failures because if you’re on an adventure, you’ve got plenty of failures, so that we can learn not to do them again.
Our successes, we’ve had a few. We want to repeat those and I thought about it and said, “How about every Tuesday at about 8:35am?” We invite anybody who’s interested to have a little peek at our adventures and come along a little bit with us. So that’s what we’re going to do.
Today we’re going to do a scene with the FBI. In real life, people do things. Whether they know it or not, they hurt somebody’s feelings or they don’t do their job right the way it should be or whatever it may be and we need to give them a little criticism. But most of us – and I included – have no idea how to deliver criticism in a way that inspires change.
Well, the problem with that is what happens is you have a criticism but you don’t deliver it. You decide, “You know what? I don’t know how to do this. I really don’t want to hurt the person’s feelings. So I sit on it,” and then you sit on it and you sit on it and either you tell somebody else. Now two of you are sitting on it or you have an eruption which is a really bad idea because you probably say things – everything wrong and if you keep the rumors going, you might even go complain to your boss and chances are your boss, he or she probably doesn’t know how to deliver criticism either because I was crappy at it and I probably will be for a while. But I’m going to try this. We’re going to do this and I think it’s going to work fantastic.
Now your boss is put in a position of either doing a crappy job of delivering criticism or looking like they don’t do anything and don’t care, both of which have really bad outcomes. OK? So to avoid all that, we’re introducing the F.B.I. (Feelings, Behavior and Impact.)
I read about this and every place I’ve heard of who have implemented it thinks it is a game-changer. It’s huge. Feelings, Behavior and Impact. So let’s say something happens and you decide you need to criticize somebody and I hate using that word because it sounds bad because you want them to improve. Let’s face it. That’s what teams do. It’s what you do with your kids, whatever. You want them to improve. You don’t want to just make them feel bad. For a while, maybe you do. But let’s be honest. We’re all human.
But generally, that’s the case. So if you can do these three things and tell them these three things in the right way, you will hopefully inspire change.
- So the first thing is FEELINGS. Something happens. You have to be able to describe how they feel.
Maybe I felt let down. I felt frustrated. I prefer not “I felt angry” because I am a strong believer that anger is an emotion you have, but you don’t want anyone else to feel. So try to take some time to step back and figure out why you’re angry.
I felt you let down the team or whatever it may be. If what happened doesn’t make you feel anything, it’s probably not important enough what you say. OK?
- BEHAVIOR. You got to talk about somebody’s behavior. It’s either what they did or what they said. You can’t say – criticize somebody because you think they feel a certain way. You can’t read people’s minds. So don’t try and behavior is probably the only thing we can all consistently change. This is why you need to deliver this as soon afterwards as possible.
We need to be able to say when the behavior happened and possibly can and describing really well for them. It gives them a chance to change. If you can’t name the behavior and you can’t figure out how to tell them, you probably better not deliver anything. OK? You need to put it on the back burner and forget about it.
- The last one is IMPACT. Whatever happened made you feel a certain way, their behavior was in such a thing. And now, what was the impact? If the behavior had no impact, why tell them? Nothing happened or nothing made you – if you think something could happen that would be worthwhile. But it has to have an impact and you need to tell that because everybody sitting in this room, 99 percent of people out there, if they know they made you feel a certain way by doing a certain thing and the impact was bad, they’re going to try not to do it again.
You’ve inspired change. That works for compliments too. If they know you felt a certain way because they did something really good and the impact was positive, they’re probably going to repeat. So this works both ways, right?
Now how do you deliver this? Ideally, obviously if it’s a compliment, it would be great if you said it in front of people. That’s awesome. If it’s not a compliment, you’re going to have to do everything in your power to be private about it.
If it’s on your mind, don’t ask somebody else to bring it up. You bring it up. Go up to the person and say, “Dan, I’m giving you an FBI.” When you do that, that’s going to sound weird the first 20 times you say it. But if we say it enough around here, it will become common. If you do that, that person knows you thought this out. It’s important enough. They better put down their cell phone, stop taking their messages and listen to you and they’re going to know that this is something they probably have the ability to change a little bit.
If it’s a compliment in front of everybody, everybody standing around is going to pick up their ears and say – they’re going to listen, right? So just say it. I’m giving you an FBI and then you go through – and you do it.
Now, I want to do a criticism but obviously we’re in front of quite a few people. So the only person I feel like I can criticize is me. So I’m going to do the two-sided man. All right. Here we go. This is an example.
Dan, I’m giving you an FBI.
I guess I better listen, huh?
Yeah. You know, yesterday, you made me feel frustrated. You made me feel desperate and overwhelmed because you made changes to the system over the weekend. You didn’t ask us about it. You didn’t warn us about it. We showed up on a Monday morning and our day blew up and Monday is a bad day anyway. Then you set the tone for the whole week. OK?
So that’s my feeling, behavior and the impact. It was devastating.
Wow, you know, I got to admit I didn’t know that. So in the future, I will try to ask ahead of time if I can. Sometimes I have to do stuff over the weekend because that’s the only time I have the time. But I will try to warn you that I’m going to do it and I’m going to get your opinion ahead of time. If it’s going to be really terrible, maybe I can break it into smaller pieces. Does that sound fair?
That’s an FBI and don’t tell me that’s not going to make a difference. That’s going to work. It’s going to make somebody think. Now, I’m going to do a compliment.
Now this one, Andrea, you wrote something really nice about Gina on our weekly team commits, and she deserves to know that. So I’m going to play Andrea here.
“So Gina, I’m giving you an FBI. You know, it made me feel proud and inspired me and it showed me I trusted the right person because you were feeling rough for a few days. You missed some work. But when you showed up, you were game on. You tried to make up for lost time and you weren’t grumpy. You had a great attitude and the impact was I know that’s the way I’ve got to act the next time I’m feeling a little off my game. So thank you very much.”
Now that’s an FBI. That’s a compliment. All right? Now we can do this and I really want this to be the standard and there’s – if you have something to say to somebody, it’s not like you should say it. You have an obligation to say it. If you don’t deliver that FBI and that person does it again, you harmed everybody here. All right?
If somebody comes to you and they tell you about something somebody else did, you have an obligation to look at that person and say, “You need to deliver an FBI,” and one more thing. If you’re in a little bit of a leadership or a management role, the first time at least, if it’s at all possible, somebody comes to you and tells you something, say, “If at all possible, you need to give that FBI.” All right?
Thanks for joining us for Trailblazer Tuesday and remember, life here on earth is not going to be a walk in the park. So don’t just go for a walk. Go on an adventure.
Our favorite office manager, Gina Hess, writes about her dad this Fathers Day:
I can’t pick a favorite memory of my dad, but there are few things that come to mind that brings a smile to my face.
For Dad and those closest, I’m sure the following will spark some pretty amazing memories: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, Huey Lewis and the News concert, Cincinnati Reds games, summer vacations, and relaxing with a cold one (preferably around the grill.) I know I don’t say this enough, but thanks for everything and love you, Dad. Enjoy your special day!
Dan Muhlenkamp has achieved National Social Security Advisors certificate from the National Social Security Association LLC in Cincinnati.
The NSSA certificate promotes advanced Social Security education providing Muhlenkamp with the knowledge to counsel clients on the best way to claim Social Security benefits in order to optimize lifetime Social Security income.
Dan Muhlenkamp specializes in Senior Planning, Business Planning and Estate Planning. The NSSA certificate program prepares professional advisors for the myriad of questions that their clients are asking. Also, with this training, advisors can guide their clients through the many Social Security options that are available. NSSA advisors are uniquely qualified to help the growing numbers of baby boomers. The program is the gold standard in Social Security certification and training in the nation.
The National Social Security Advisors certificate program was created by CPA, Marc Kiner and Jim Blair, a 35 year veteran of the Social Security Association. With 10,000 Baby Boomers turning 65 each day in the U.S., Kiner and Blair, believe that advisors must be educated regarding Social Security. There are 76 million Baby Boomers nationwide. Boomers are folks born between 1946 and 1964.
“For more and more people, Social Security is going to provide an important part of their retirement income,” said Blair. “NSSA advisors are passionate about helping retirees optimize their benefits over the rest of their lives.”
For more information call Dan Muhlenkamp at 419-678-2326.
For more information about the NSSA certificate program, go to www.nationalsocialsecurityassociation.com
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According to the Dayton Daily News, about 4 million Ohioans and 103 million Americans will be traveling over 50 miles this Christmas weekend and many of them will be driving. Traffic is set to increase around 37% this Christmas, which is the highest rise since 2001 when AAA started tracking holiday travel. This staggering statistic shouldn’t be too surprising as young people are moving farther away from home. Since we would all like to be spending time with our families over this Christmas holiday, here are a few things we can all do to keep each other safe out there.
One of the major distractions on the rise has been texting while driving. Checking or reading a text message takes your eyes off the road for an average of five seconds. How far can you travel at 65 mph in five seconds? Almost one tenth of a mile! A lot can happen in that short time frame. We are sure you’ve heard it many times, but the text, call or post can wait until you arrive safely at your destination. Nothing is more important behind the wheel than your safety and the safety of your fellow motorists sharing the road with you. Wait to reply to that text or call until you are off the road and safely stopped. Some other examples of distracted driving to avoid would be eating or drinking while driving and trying to play around with the music selections when your attention should remain on the roadway.
Drinking and driving is another predicament people find themselves in this time of year. I personally come from a long line of Irish Catholics who refuse to celebrate without a little alcohol present. We may all have a good time at the party, but we always designate a sober driver to get us safely home at the end of the night. If you are going to be celebrating your holidays with a little “eggnog” make sure to have a plan to get home at the end of the night.
The weather can be a deterrent for travel this time of year as well. It wasn’t 10 days ago that we had some surrounding counties under weather advisories and not allowed on the road ways. Make sure to check the weather conditions before traveling and be sure to pack extra blankets, water and flashlights in case you find yourself in need of a tow because of icy roadways. Also, if the weather looks like it might be become a little inclimate, make sure to give yourself enough extra time to get to your destination safely! If you are going to try to get up early to leave or stay a little late to try to avoid traffic, make sure you are well rested! Drowsiness is another leading cause of accidents across the United States when we find ourselves in a hurry from time to time.
With all of the extra people on the road during this holiday season (which is looking to be unseasonably warm) remember to try your best to stay calm. Yes, someone may cut over in traffic causing an extra delay, or maybe going a little slower than you may like, but instead of letting your anger get the best of you, remember how much fun you are going to have with your loved ones instead! So remember, keep your cell phone away until you arrive, designate your own sober transport and keep those hands on the wheel and eyes on the road. From all of us here at Preferred Insurance Center, we wish you a safe and Merry Christmas season and a wonderful 2017!
3 Things you should know about renters insurance! Ohio Insurance.
These days, young people are waiting longer to get married and in an effort to get out of mom and dad’s while still saving money, move into a house or apartment with a roommate or few people. This is a great idea, but don’t be naive and forget about all of your belongings. Here are few things you need to know about Ohio renters insurance!
- If you are still a full-time student away at school, you and your belongings would still be covered on your parent’s homeowners policy. A percentage of their coverage would extend to you in the event of a loss. This includes living in the dorms or student housing, and off campus apartment or housing. Your roommate’s belongings would not be covered in the event of a loss. If you are no longer in school, to cover your belongings would need an Ohio renters policy.
Donating $10 to local charity for every policy we quote!
- If your roommate has a renters policy and there is a covered loss, the only way your belongings would be covered is if you are related or married. If you are not related or married, the company covering the loss would deny any coverage to your belongings because you are not related. This allows renters policy premiums to remain low and deter any conflict arising from a loss.
- If you plan on moving out on your own but still need to rent for a while, don’t hesitate adding a renters policy to cover you and your belongings. Moving in with a roommate or multiple people? Encourage them to do the same for all the unknowns as we’d hate to have their belongings uncovered in the event of a loss!Give us a call to learn more about renters insurance! Or Click Here to get an Ohio renters quote!Yours truly,Andrea AbouJaoude | Service Specialist
To buy Ohio insurance online or from an insurance agency?
Is it easy to find Ohio insurance online? Absolutely. Is it easy to purchase insurance online? Most likely. With these two questions answered, why would you pick an Ohio insurance agency? We understand that insurance can be intimidating, sometimes maybe a little scary, and most of the time you probably don’t think much of your policy at all. That is of course until you need to use it. The 6 perks for picking an agency listed below are only a few of the things we have made standard at Preferred Insurance Center that all benefit you, our client.
- Every year we offer what we call an Account Review. We place a phone call when your homeowners or renters policy comes up for renewal and give you the option to answer a few questions, and go over your coverage’s on your policies. Some of the questions include asking about updates or renovations made to your home and going over your auto coverage’s to understand your policy. Filling out this form gets us the most up to date information to properly shop your account for the best rates if you so choose.
Donating $10 to local charity for every policy we quote!
- Flag alerts on large rate increases. These alerts take place when ANY policy takes a larger rate increase than expected. This allows us to get in front of the renewal process giving us more time to possibly find a better company/rate for the next term. Our calls for the account review and rate increases are placed before the renewal comes in the mail to allow us to be the ones to alert you instead of hearing through the mail.
- Have a claim? This is usually not a “fun” experience, but we do our best to follow up regularly to make sure your questions and concerns are addressed in a timely fashion. We send an email with your adjuster’s name and contact information so it is available at your fingertips if ever needed. We do our absolute best to keep you happy during what can sometimes be an unnerving experience.
- Need to change a vehicle on your policy? We do our best to get you off the phone quickly to get you right back to your day. Need to pay a bill? We can assist you with that as well in a timely manner. Adding a driver? We let you know what you need to get to us so the process is finished as quickly as possible.
- One-call Insurance Company. Unlike calling a company which can take several minutes out of your day waiting to get a human on the phone, we are a “one-call company.” We are able to assist with auto, home, life and commercial insurance policies all at the same place making it a huge convenience for you.
- One call gets you quotes from 8 great companies! We do the shopping for you! We have several companies available to us which makes finding the best rates easier than it would be for you to check each company individually on your own.
If you have been using the internet to find the best rates for you, I encourage you to give Preferred Insurance Center a shot. Who knows?! We may be able to increase your coverage’s and save you money along the way! Click Here to get a quote!
Andrea AbouJaoude | Service Specialist
While carrying Adler, I knew that breastfeeding was my only option. In my mind, it was going to be this awesome bonding experience, and I was going to be Wonder Woman, exclusively breastfeeding, being an awesome mom, working full time, DOING IT ALL. I had done all the research, thought I had all the answers, and we were ready for our little man. I labored all day, and we were so anxious to meet our baby boy. When he finally arrived, after over 12 hours of an epidural, pitocin, IV drip, and absolutely nothing to eat, labor got the best of me. I remember about an hour after he was born we giggled at just how big he was (9lbs, 13oz to be exact) and just how simply in love we were. After our family members took a quick peek at him, it was time to nurse him for the very first time. I remember the nurse helping me, and it seemed like everything was going the way I envisioned then I started dry heaving. So in my big mama debut, my OB/GYN was finishing up everything “downstairs”, Luke was doting over our little man, the nurse is trying to get Adler to latch, and my mom is holding the puke bucket over him so that in case I barfed, the baby would be safe. And they said motherhood was glorious. I was exhausted and the nurse said that it would be best to give Adler formula for overnight, and that it was most likely all the medicines I had that day making him drowsy. She promised tomorrow would be better.
I woke up ready to take on the challenge, excited to hold him again and nourish him. But it wasn’t going better, I began feeling overwhelmed and defeated, but I assured myself that my feelings were normal, and just like anything else, time would fix the problem. And temporarily, I felt like it was getting better. Adler seemed to be finally latching and getting his rhythm down, but he never seemed satisfied after nursing. And I began the uphill battle of feeling inadequate, and like the worst mom in the world.
Our struggle with breastfeeding went on for 5 long, agonizing months. Numerous calls to the La Leche League. Sobbing, sobbing, sobbing. Taking every supplement that even hinted at being a milk supply booster. More sobbing, sobbing, sobbing. And then finally deciding to throw in the towel, giving in to formula feeding, which brought in a whole new set of emotions. As much as I dreaded the failure I was feeling while breastfeeding, I still didn’t want to stop. It was this awful cycle, and my feelings of failure lasted quite awhile.
Fast forward to December 1, 2012 and a positive pregnancy test. I sat in my bathroom and cried for at least a half hour. Another baby was not in our plans, and I was definitely not ready to ride the emotional roller coaster that I knew breastfeeding was going to be. After my 2 month pity party, I knew their had to be a better way, and was determined to never experience how I felt again. I was desperate to not go through that battle again, and was willing to do ANYTHING to fix the problem. I remember typing every phrase under the sun into the google box, and there it was placenta encapsulation.
I had heard of Holly Madison and January Jones doing this very thing, and Hollywood and the what not going to town on their own thoughts of how ridiculous it was. And believe me, I was skeptical and a little grossed out too, but after seeing success after success of everything I was feeling post pregnancy solved by this little miracle, I was all in. Thankfully for me, I have world’s greatest husband, who said he was also all in, and was so all in that he would encapsulate it himself. Ladies and Gents Luke Craft, Husband of the decade. Thankfully for me, both my OB/GYN and delivering hospital were also on board.
Over the next few months while carrying Oliver, we organized our game plan and how we were going to get this accomplished. We bought a food dehydrator, pill encapsulation kit, and watched a lot of you tube videos. We brought the placenta home in a Styrofoam cooler, and then Luke cleaned off the umbilical cord and sac, cut it into strips, and dehydrated it for over 15 hours. When that was completed, he ground it up in the food processor and filled vegetable pill capsules until it was all gone.
It was less than 4 days after Oliver’s delivery before I started taking the pills. Within 48 hours after the first one, I noticed a huge difference in just about everything. I felt rested, I was healing faster, and I was pumping anywhere from 12-18 ounces, just in the morning. Originally, I had planned to start stocking a supply for my return to work at about 4 weeks. And like last time, I was really wanting to exclusively nurse Ollie; but similar to Adler, he was a lazy eater, and it ended up working out better to just pump and bottle feed my little champ. Plus, with that amount of a supply, and a wild toddler, I just didn’t have the time to nurse for 20-30 minutes then pump right after for the same amount of time, to turn around and do it all over again in another 2 hours. 12 days postpartum I returned to crossfit, and I by no means am a I crossfit warrior, I just felt that great. I had the energy to keep up with the housework, chase around Adler, and tend to baby Ollie. And by my return to work 7 weeks later, I was fitting into most of my pregnancy clothes.
Not to mention, my deep freeze could not hold all the milk I was producing and had to stock. And when my deep freeze was full, I took over the 3 drawers in the freezer at my job, and then I took over my Grandmas and a co workers deep freezer. At first we kept our decision to encapsulate my placenta pretty private. When we did share, most people were intrigued, some found it gross, and others seemed pretty neutral and just curious for how it would work. Since Ollie’s birth, I have had a couple people share their own struggles with me, and I have found myself wanting to shout out our success and share our solution because no mama should ever feel how I felt. No mother should ever feel inadequate and defeated.
Some people have told me that there was probably another solution to what my struggles were, and maybe they are right. Maybe there was medication I could have taken for the post partum blues, lack of supply, and just overall stress level. But hands down, I will swear by our choice to encapsulate my placenta, and will not think twice about doing it again in the future. One little google search saved my life, and allowed me to be the mama I wanted to be.
I’ve chosen to be open about my placenta encapsulation so that other women know that this process is amazing and our bodies truly are meant to heal and nourish themselves. I began offering the encapsulation service locally over a year ago and numerous moms have been so thankful to have theirs done right here in their community! Feel free to contact me with more questions, concerns, or if you just want to know more of the science surrounding the placenta.
Kylie Craft | Essential Oil Educator
A toxic parent is a parent who’s behaviors are transmitted unto children that could potentially cause them direct or indirect harm. All parents can have varying grades of toxicity, and sadly, it’s a lot more common than you may think. The number one job as a parent is to be a good role model for your child and hopefully have their life be better than yours was. All families should try to model healthy relationship dynamics and be a support system for the children. A lot of times parents aren’t realizing that their actions could be harmful to their children. These are some of the behaviors that could indicate that you’re a toxic parent;
- You and your partner fight in front of your children.
- You are overly critical or easily disappointed.
- You stand in between your child and their goals.
- You don’t allow your children to express themselves freely.
- You relentlessly “joke” about stuff your kid does.
- You make your kids responsible for making you happy.
Another thing a new parent needs to think about is the fact that your child is a sponge. Your child is curious about everything and they’re always looking and listening. Naturally, kids’ actions are learned mostly from those who are most influential in their lives – namely their parents. Yelling, anger problems, talking negatively about things/people, gossiping and selfish behavior are all actions that kids soak up. So as a parent you need to become the prime role model for your child, even when you don’t think their paying attention. For more information about this topic feel free to visit the websites below.
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